SFcrowsnest

The Trump Science Fiction Agenda?

  1. Order up Skynet – after all, there is no such thing as time travel. Screw you, Arnold.
  2. Entice some of those alien hunters down to take on the drug posses.
  3. Make the Moon the 50th…51st…52nd…what number is it? 53rd state and make it a home for those irritating reporters.
  4. Use the China Syndrome as a quick means to tunnel to China.
  5. Build one of those Deathstar things.
  6. Attack the Martians before they attack us. Send our bugs to them now!
  7. Just in case those science boys think I’m not going to use them, I want a Jurassic Park up and running before the end of my first term as President.
  8. I will make sure there is food for everyone with soylent green. I will even make the colour flesh coloured for those who don’t like eating their greens.
  9. Every home should have an ape as a pet. I will have an orang utan as my bodyguard as we look alike.
  10. Those nice Shadow creatures are our friends.
  11. Those nice visiting Sirians are our friends and are cheap to feed and will remove our rodent problem.
  12. I promise there will be shorter instructions for zero gravity toilets.
  13. Screw 13. I don’t like unlucky numbers.
  14. The Tenctonese will do all the lower paid jobs or we won’t give them any sea water.
  15. Oscar Goldman for my chief of defence. If he can’t do it, then Tony Stark.
  16. I put the 12 Monkeys people in control of protection from infectious diseases.
  17. Don’t invite Vulcans to chess tournaments.
  18. The Klingons are our friends.
  19. Bolivar Trask’s sentinels program will sort out the mutant menace.
  20. Microsoft’s Word spell-checker will be turned off permanently. I want equally bad spelling for all.
  21. The Borg are from Sweden, right, like the tennis player?
  22. Send a spaceship to Jupiter to investigate that black oblong thing that’s out there.
  23. Get Doctor Strangelove on the phone for a word.
  24. I hear the pod harvest in Santa Mira is going well. I want to see it go nationwide.
  25. What do you mean? I can’t replace Air Force One with the Roswell saucer?
  26. Get those Men In Black to make people forget my bad decisions.
  27. I’m not on medication, so why should I care which red or blue pill I take?
  28. Let the Green Lantern Corps sort out anything off-planet.
  29. Who cares if I mess things up, that Brit Time Lord will sort out anything wrong I do.
  30. The triffids will make a great new vegetable food source.
  31. I want Newspeak in operation and ‘Big Donald Is Watching You’ signs put up immediately.