I want to introduce you to two friends of mine I met back in 1983 or whatever the century was. First there’s the short guy with a quiff, Waldo ‘D.R.’ Dobbs and his big buddy, Ernest Errol Quinch. ‘D.R.’ stands for diminished responsibility but, man, he has a heart of gold, probably donated by someone who didn’t want it anymore after they wall-crashed a party. They are real party animals and always out to make a grand entrance anywhere. As the stories in this volume show, neither of them are criminals, mostly because they find neat ways to prove that they didn’t do it or wipe out the people who thought they did. They can even have you send neat letters to your parents absolving them of all blame when running a scouting holiday. They also tell tall and even taller, if you ever see Quinch’s mum, stories. I mean, can you really believe they wiped out that little blue planet Earth? Just because they have a casual disregard for life, doesn’t mean that they won’t like you.
D.R. gets on well with everyone once you understand him. He even made friends with former soldier Pulger and got him and his mates a charity home so they could remember and play act their former duties after they’d been asked to do something to show that they’d reformed. He even fell in love with Chrysoprasia or Crazy Chryssie as she decided to call herself after Quinch tried showing her D.R.’s true nature, thinking it would get her out of his friend’s life. Instead, man, she like totally dug it and couldn’t wait to get in on the action. How can you not like the pair of them when they can make such friends?
They aren’t geeks neither. Both have served military service and even made a movie in Hollywood. A good one called ‘Mind The Oranges, Marlon’, that was the last movie of its star when he pulled the wrong orange from the pile and got squashed. Did I tell you about their scout movement? Man, they did move with their mouths open but no sound coming out.
‘D.R. & Quinch’ had a short life in comicbooks, mostly because their chief scribe and robot, Alan Moore, went on to write bigger and deadlier things. Either that or they fed him to a shufflegruffe! Their artist robot, Alan Davies, avoiding a nervous breakdown for a time and with the help of another robot called Jamie Delano who helped with their agony pages did something likewise. As to whether there is any truth in the similarities between D.R. & Quinch and Squiggy & Lennie from ‘Laverne & Shirley’ then probably not, mostly because they were smarter and didn’t need to pal around with two sissy girls.
Young, gifted and violent. Also extremely black-humoured. Man, if you’ve nevered palled with D.R. & Quinch then they’ll blow your brains out. Me? I sent them all my money and they told me how to steal more to give to them. How can you beat that? Totally cool, man.
(pub: 2000AD. 128 page graphic novel. Price: £ 5.50 (UK) if you know where to look. ISBN: 978-1-906735-88-3)
check out website: www.2000adonline.com